Life is often as flat as a pancake after all the madness of Christmas and NewYear but you can pump it up with a weeks half board holiday for two at the four star Hotel Las Aguilas thanks to Tenerife Magazine.

Perched on a hill overlooking Puerto de la Cruz the views of Mount Teide and the surrounding valleys are amazing. Last time I popped in there was even snow on Teide’s peak, quite a contrast to the sun terrace by one of the outside bars or the energetic aerobics going on in one of the swimming pools.

Of course being a nosey git I had a good dig around and was impressed, a good choice of restaurants, tennis courts, and even a giant chess set so I could pretend to be intellectual. My friends had been staying there for a week and enjoyed the nightly music and entertainment but being fellow explorers they had taken advantage of the shuttle bus down to Puerto de la Cruz to check out the shops and tour the plazas and historic battlements.

The north of Tenerife has a whole different flavour so Hotel Las Aguilas is the perfect base for walking and sampling nearby towns and villages, even the capital Santa Cruz is just a short jaunt away.

Anyway if you want to win a weeks half board holiday for two, just click on the Tenerife Magazine home page and answer an easy question. The prize will be drawn on Tuesday 31^st January and can be taken, subject to availability, within the next year. The prize is not transferable and must be claimed within 2 weeks of the draw or it will be re-drawn. Good luck.

Some christmas traditions are still special even if your not a young boy anymore but as I am still in short trousers I can be excused for making a pilgrimage to Santa Cruz to see the nativity scenes or belens as they are called here in Tenerife. First stop was Caja Canarias HQ in Plaza del Patriotismo, in the hallway outside  there were large displays from a childrens christmas card contest and proud parents were taking photos of their offsprings work.

They basically use the same models and scenery for this display but change the layout each year, this time it was one long display of rolling hills and little farming hamlets. Several of the fiqures move, chopping wood or lifting hay and even the little ponds have live fish in them. The room lighting dims and rises again constantly to give night scenes when fires and lights shine through from inside the houses. Two staff members were on hand to make sure that no eager hands made a grab like a scene from Land Of The Giants, fancy being a bouncer on a nativity show.

The whole of the capital city is in christmas mode, the ice rink is back but moved from Plaza de España to Plaza Europa much to the annoyance of some shop keepers. It’s real ice, not this plastic stuff, and proved very popular last year. I wandered by during the afternoon break and could just manage a peak through the window, despite being a long term hockey fan I’m as graceful on the ice as an elephant on marbles so they wont have missed me out there. It’s here until 8 January and opens from 10.30 to 2 pm, and 4.30 to 11 pm, just 5 euros an hour (4 euros for 12′s and under) including skate hire.

Back to the nativity hunt, this time at the Cabildo building, their theme this year was cave dwelling and the models were suitably impressive. The stable scene is the final one in a fairly compact show, if you look up the stairs you can also catch a glimpse of the impressive stained glass in the Tenerife governments home. All these belens are free to see, the Cabildo always have a voluntary donation box for a local charity, this year it’s Caritas who do fine work helping the homeless and needy.Out at Plaza Candelaria the nativity stable looked wonderful with Joseph, Mary, and the animals, sadly no baby Jesus in the crib as he got stolen last year.

The shopping streets had to be explored as well, all the traders are trying to boost trade at a difficult time so the least I could do was to see what they were up to. Calle Teobaldo Power were going for a green christmas with a tree decorating day and a green carpet, all part of a Binter Airlines sponsorship. My favourite though was Calle Jesus Nazareno, my eye was caught by their candy striped extensions to the bollards, I even caught the Candyman himself painting his way up the street. What a simple but effective idea, the traders from the surrounding cafes and beauty parlour all came out to appreciate his magnificent handiwork.

I knew there was another belen I should have found, it was the Canarian Parliament building in Calle del Castillo, the main shopping street. The outside may now look like a modern tea room but scan upward and the faded lime green roof is a dead giveaway. This was another long parade of festive inspired village scenes but looking just behind them I could see Canarian landmarks like the basalt cliffs of Vallehermoso in La Gomera. Inspired by the Catalan tradition of El Caganer, the poohing peasant, there was a figure caught in the crevice of a rock with his trousers down answering the call of nature, good job it wasn’t aromavision.

It has to be said it was fairly quiet in Santa Cruz, what with the lack of money and the regular promotions to prise wallets open again, but at least I went home with a warm glow in my heart. Christmas eh – don’t you just love it.

Hey, fancy coming back to see my battleship? that’s got to be one of the most impressive chat up lines. Judging by the beaming smiles on the young ladies heading off the gang plank of HMS Montrose shore leave definately has its attractions. The 185 good men and women of the Type 23 Royal Navy frigate certainly deserved their four day break in Santa Cruz, having just left their Devonport base in Plymouth they were stocking up and gearing up for a six month tour in the South Atlantic keeping a watchful eye on the Falkland Islands and other outposts 8,000 plus nautical miles away.

PM Call Me Dave has just issued the go ahead for commercial ships to carry arms and security staff when sailing the pirate infested African seas off Somali. A year ago Montrose patrolled that area and blasted a roque pirate ship out of the water. Just looking at the 32 Seawolf missiles and the imposing 4.5 inch gun turret was enough to dispel any thoughts I had about getting an eye patch and a parrot. Lieutenant Commander Sam Law, the ships public relations officer gave me a guided tour below decks, I was surprised how relatively spacious it was, even the junior messdecks have a chill out area with Tv, DVD and Hi Fi. Up on deck I resisted the urge to reset the main gun to face Gran Canaria.

The bridge was very compact with clear views out onto Santa Cruz dock, I even got to swivel in Commander Jonathan Lett’s chair. A helicopter had definately been mentioned in the research I had done so where had they hidden it? That was easily answered as my guide pulled open the hanger door up on deck to reveal a Lynx helicopter with rotor blades folded and ready to pounce like a coiled spring. Even this bit of hardware packs a hefty punch, Sea Skua anti ship missiles, Stingray torpedos, depth charges, and machine guns could soon teach an opponent the error of their ways.

The current Montrose, the third to proudly bear the name was built on the Clyde and launched in 1992. capable of 28 knots it’s driven by 5.2 mw of power but the bit of information that impressed me was all its vertical surfaces have a 70 degree slope which makes it appear the size of a fishing ship on radar. Suitably impressed I left the ship hoping that the manly absent crew enjoy all the excesses that Tenerife can offer, even with summer creeping in at the South Atlantic it’s a long trip away – fair winds and tides to them all.

Was it Carnaval time again in Tenerife? The streets of Santa Cruz were bristling with people, police and Unipol cars were visible on all corners and there was even an eye in the sky in the police helicopter.  Anyone would think royalty had come to call, well it had in the majestic form of Queen Mary 2, tucked in behind fellow cruise liners Voyager Of the Seas and Liberty Of The Seas on the far quayside. Heading into the flow of dissembarking passengers I headed down the ramp at the ferry station to gaze across at the illustrious visitors.

Security was tight on QM2′s maiden voyage call seven years ago but now it was tighter than ever, glued to the phone earlier in the week neither the Tenerife port authority, Cunard in Southampton or their various press and PR agencies were offering a close up and personal tour. The previous day the port carried out a bomb threat simulation around the Costa Deliziosa to test security but the Fred Olsen cruise ship Balmoral was parked up on the near pier so at least I got to cozey on up to that, no mean ship itself with 1,750 crew and passengers.

Queen Mary was undoutedly the star and even at a distance she was attracting a large fan club, I headed down to the old jet foil station for a closer look from their small jetty. Small fishing boats seemed to be looking up in awe at their regal visitor and I’m sure the Fred Olsen ferry’s blast on the horn as it passed had a tone of respect about it. At this point maybe I should fire a few QM2 stats at you. At 1,132 feet (345 metres) long the QM2 covers 3.5 acres, weighs 151,400 tons and has 17 decks making it as high as a 23 storey building. At full stretch she can do 30 knots and on this visit brought 2,200 passengers and 1,100 crew.

Despite only being seven years old and having had a few minor touches done in Greenock before this cruise, the QM2 is heading to Blohm in Germany for a refit after taking in Gran Canaria,Lanzarote, Lisbon, Vigo, and dropping off back in Southampton. Bringing a healthy boost to Santa Cruz the four cruise ships between them carried 10,550 passengers and 3,400 crew – ker ching went those tills. There was no respite for the port, the next day four more liners were due, Marco Polo, Adventure Of The Seas, Thomson Destiny, and Costa Mediterranea. Never a dull moment.

As someone who spent two school terms making a clay ash tray that looked like an offensive weapon I’m pretty impressed by those with the skills to fashion a pipe from a tree branch or make a coffee table using only their finger nail clippings. Thankfully these skills were not used by any of the 200 exhibitors at this years Feria de Artesania (craft fair) at the Recinto Ferial in Santa Cruz.

I expected a bit of a scrum down to get in as it was free but the mid afternoon concourse was empty and the aisles inside were almost clear with just a smattering of people browsing. Never mind, with a cheery good day stout yeoman to the doorman I went inside the modernish designed show hall, I still refer to it as the squashed pastie. The fair had attracted artesans from all seven islands, one of the first I gravitated to had traditional costumes but the holder had gone walkabout. One of the dummies held a basket full of individually wrapped chunky almond biscuits so I took a couple to road test, very nice, all crunchy on the outside with a softer centre.

There was a real mixed bag of stalls with very well made and imaginative toys, soaps, perfumes, glass ware, clothes and furniture. What was missing was customers, some exhibitors looked bored rigid, two old chaps as wrinkly as Canarian potatoes were selling home made musical instruments but I thought it odd that they had some retro Take That blaring out from their radio. The 80′s pop conspiracy grew as I headed up the stairs to the balcony cafe to be greeted by Tears For Fears wafting down the steps. As I ordered my coffee and roll  I noticed that the serving ladies uniforms bore the word Faster with the additional word Catering in small letters beneath. A thousand innuendos crossed my mind but I was strong and just gave them one of my winning smiles.

Nosing around again downstairs I found the cakes, jams and biscuits stalls and tried a few samples, very tastey, I could have had a meal at the restaurant below the bar. There were some lovely toys and dolls on the nearby stalls, good early christmas shopping I would think. The reconditioned furniture looked very stylish and the bed looked very bouncy, dare I test it for sqeaky springs? maybe not, apparently I’m supposed to be a grown up. It was all a bit of a shame, hopefully the evenings and weekend will pick up as people finish work, a lot of people were hoping for a much needed business boost. The fair is on until close of play on Sunday 6 November and opens from 11 am to 9 pm.

Politicians? If they said it was Monday I’d immediately check my calendar, I don’t trust any of them. Here in the municipality of Arona there is not so much an anger against the local council, more like a general tut tutting over the morning coffee. Legal cases have been brought against 34 local councillors of all political parties for alleged corruption but it’s all a long drawn out process that will run and run.

Long serving Alcalde (mayor) Jose Alberto Gonzalez Reveron of the Coalicion Canarias has come in for particular stick and is one of the charged. The main complaints refer to business licences granted between 2003 and 2007 and the latest revelation is that all parties have agreed to pay 140,000 euros for the defence of the accused politicians.Anyway against this backdrop a Anti Corruption march was called for Saturday 29 October, meeting up at the court building on the edge of Las Americas and marching to the Los Cristianos cultural centre.

I popped along to have a look, the roads were heavily marshalled by police and civil protection but the protesters only numbered around 200, including a coach bringing protesters from as far away as Icod and Candelaria.  The group included families with small children, political groups such as Partido Communista del Pueblo Canarioand the Alternativa Nacionalista Canaria – oh and a few subversive looking dogs. The march was noisy with horns and drums as they moved slowly down one carriageway of Avenida de Chayofita past the sports centre before turning off for the cultural centre and speeches.

People in bars that they passed showed little reaction, preferring to watch football on television. Maybe we do get what we deserve, the local elections were on 22 May and only 48.5 % (myself included) of the Arona electorate turned out to vote, the lowest percentage in Tenerife. Meanwhile the court cases rumble on – slowly.

Vilaflor has a special place in my memory as I did my first big walk in Tenerife at Paisaje de Lunar just above the small but beautifully formed village. That was nearly 10 years ago and I have been back many times to try other nearby walks, never failing to be impressed by the marching pine trees and the tajinaste plants with their bursts of red bloom. The frontage of the Hotel Spa Villalba has always caught my eye as I puffed and panted past but now some lucky pair are going to win a seven night half board break there through Tenerife Magazine.

The rural setting will tie you into the past of Tenerife but as part of the Reveron Hotels group, Hotel Spa Villalba boasts four star comfort and facilities headed by the relaxing and luxurious spa with sauna, Jacuzzi and pool.  There is a choice of two restaurants, La Vendimia offers the best of Spanish cuisine with the finest natural ingredients and Terraza has a beautiful outdoor setting with the same high quality.

Two of my colleagues have just got back from luxuriating in the hotel so if you want to read a first hand account just follow this link. just because I like to stomp around disturbing nature and frightening wildlife it doesn’t mean you have to walk all over Teide National Park, slide down rough tracks and commute with nature like Grizzly Adams but I can definately recomend exploring the nearby countryside and sampling a few nice bars and restaurants. Vilaflor is a very peaceful historic town so you could have a walk through there in between enjoying some good old fashioned pampering at the hotel.

To enter the competition just go to the Tenerife Magazine homepage and answer a question so easy that Katie Price would eventually get it. One lucky winner and guest can have a seven nights half board stay for free, all you have to do is answer the question below and click your answer to us by 9 pm on Wedneday 30th November. The draw will be made the following day , you will be notified by email and once confirmed your good news will be posted on the Tenerife Magazine Facebook page. The prize does not include transport and there is no cash alternative, dates are subject to availability. Good luck!

The sea may be lovely for swimming but there are choppy waters around Los Cristianos port as old and new collide. Changes are taking place in the layout of the fishermens area between the old beach and the ferry port as the port authority looks to modernise and increase revenue. It’s not just physical changes, Los Cristianos has grown steadily but is still very much a working area for the fishing trade but many of the seafaring folk and the Asociacion Vecinos – Amigos de Los Cristianos (neighbours & friends) feel their way of life is being eroded by tighter controls on their catch and higher mooring fees.

There has been a crackdown on outstanding fees around the harbour and some boats have been cleared away, others are now being brought nearer the shore at new moorings. Down by the ferry port many old small fishing boats are now moored by ropes while on the quayside new pontoons are being lowered into place in the water. New concrete seating with the port authority crest on them have started to appear and the general look is changing presumably to encourage more profitable leisure craft. On top of this cold wind of change many boat owners complained that their recent traditional celebrations for the  Virgen del Carmen were restricted by petty rules being enforced.

There is a growing rearguard action among the locals, several meetings have been held at the cultural centre and the Platforma en Defensa de Los Cristianos attracted 300 concerned supporters to the Plaza del Pescadora two weeks ago. the next protest is on Friday 7th October at the church plaza. then on Saturday 15 October at 4 pm the fishermen are holding their Sortija de Barcos, a gathering of boats with crew in old traditional costume. It’s a celebration of their proud past but in the current climate it may well have an air of defiance as an added extra. So keep an eye on the port, you don’t need a bit of seaweed to predict that things could get choppy.

Well another Saturday afternoon and there I was bobbing up and down on the deck of a Colombian training ship in Santa Cruz. That wasn’t part of the original plan but what’s the odd diversion or two when your having fun. I was up in Santa Cruz to cover the Sal2 promotional day for Tenerife Magazine, loads of shops throwing open their doors with special offers, live music, and lots of food offers.

I was sat in Plaza Candelaria listening to a few bands warming up and noticed in the paper that the Colombian triple mast training ship Gloria was in port, so I had to have some of that. Looking out from the top of the Fred Olsen ferry terminal I could see the masts over by the quayside where the cruise liners tie up, and not knowing whether I could get up close I tried my luck and headed for the port gate, normally manned by a jobsworth security guard. Getting nearer it became clear that people were streaming back with posters and other goodies tucked under their arms – goodie it was open house.

Let’s get technical, Gloria was built in Bilbao, Spain in 1968 and the crew of 160 included 77 cadettes literally learning the ropes.Striding up the gang plank I was welcomed aboard by the white uniformed crew and made very welcome, the decks were split level and loaded up with brasses, tightly coiled circles of rope, and lots of freshly scrubbed floor boards. The tallest mast is 40 metres and even without the sails rigged they looked damm impressive and a little scarey to me. The information room below deck had loads of hand outs and a detailed glossy colour booklet with all the facts about the proud ship. The current voyage was of over 5 months, 10 countries and 14 ports including Waterford in Ireland, and Greenock and Lerwick in Scotland. next stop was Martinique, I was tempted to stow  away but remembered how queasy the boating lake in Oxford uded to make my feel.

Leaving the ship I decided to walk away from the flow and Santa Cruz centre to see what the grey battle ship was just around the corner. It was quite a surprise to see the name Black Rover written on the stern end and London underneath. Moving round to the gang plank I shouted up and a British crew member answered and came down to chat. Turns out the Black  Rover A 273 is part of the British Royal Fleet Auxiliary and spends its missions servicing and supplying naval ships often in very rough conditions. In Santa Cruz for a week, the Swan Hunter built in Wallsend, Newcastle 40 years ago had come in from the Falklands and was heading back to home base in Portland, Dorset.

I didn’t go aboard but was invited back to get permission from the duty officer, sadly I will be away during their stay in Tenerife. Most of the 70 crew were off on shore leave but I extended an invitation to join the Armada Sur pre game the next day, apparently most of the crew are football mad scousers. With duty calling me back to Sal2 i headed back into the city but hope to nose around a few more ships whenever they pass this way.

You probably know that Tenerife Magazine is closer to my heart than my signed photo of Sue Barker so forgive my bias but the new look is pretty nifty. Even better we have another holiday competition, a double whammy this time, GF Hotels have put up a four night stay in the Costa Adeje Gran Hotel, the big posh looking 5 star place just above Fañabe and as well as that Aecan.com are offering a further three nights at one of their rural houses, both prizes for two people. It’s easy to enter, just go to the Tenerife Magazine home page and the entry form with all the terms will jump out at you, just fill in the details and submit them by 9 pm on Thursday 29 September and the next day you will be in the draw.

Costa Adeje Gran Hotel has rooftop swimming pools, great views and the a la carte restaurant La Laja to tempt you as well as great service and a central location. Fañabe and El Duque beaches are a short walk away, both large and good for swimming but I must admit a preference for La Caleta a little further along, the sea is still lively despite attempts to tame it a few years ago, and the fishing village does a great line in sea food. The Aecan rural retreat might surprise some of you but the less developed parts of Tenerife are wonderful with walks that will reward you in so many ways.

So get yourself along to Tenerife Magazine, browse the articles, give us some feedback on Facebook and Twitter if you want, and put your entry in for the holiday. Good luck.